The land of notes, knives and no regrets
Hello! I am Caroline, a very devoted Smerchette, who runs a Stephen Merchant appretiation blog. I do a lot of doodles, and a lot of Smerchspammng. And... that's about it. I'm a British weirdo who wants to act alongside Stephen Merchant one day, and I was lucky enough to meet him!
Stephen, if you are reading this, it may be a good idea to leave pretty sharpish. Firstly though, you're awesome and really cool, but please leave here right now.
Catching Elephant is a theme by Andy Taylor
This song describes how I feel right now so well (and it’s a beautiful song too), especially the first few lines. I miss you Stephen, I hope you have fun in New York, and you truly are the best thing that’s happened this year. 
I’ve fallen in love honestly.
So I’m wearing my heart on my sleeve.
In the hope that these notes and the words that I sing make you see.
You mean more than the world does to me.
Did you know that when Stephen Merchant touches a true Smerchette, they will begin to glow white?
Mental thoughts: HIS HAND HIS HAND HE’S TOUCHING ME OH LORD KILL ME NOW SO THAT I DIE WITH THIS MEMORY OH SWEET MERCY
R.I.P. Chuck Norris, my wonderful, beautiful mouse who, when left with another male, had 14 lovely children, one of which he ate. He leaves his son Jacob, wife Maisy and daughter Daisy to deal with all the crap he’s left around his cage. So here he is on Steve’s shoulder; Chuck Norris only likes awesome people. I can imagine him jumping onto famous people’s shoulders in Mouse Heaven right now.
Asdfg reblog if you post Smerch stuff, I need more merchant on my dash~
Smerch you say?
I may post some of him…
Smerchspam of Stephen Merchant
That’s right, because the other Smerchspams weren’t Stephen Merchant Smerchspams.
… I have a cold and I don’t know what I’m talking about.
Moving on.
Let’s watch Steve dance
You little danceyman
Hello Ladies Mini-Smerchspam
I’d do more but I need to make more Days of Merchmas
Smerch addictions
Seeing as it’s Children in Need, I’d thought I’d do a post about a serious problem: Smerch addiction.
”Hello. I’m Caroline, and I’ve suffered from a Smerch addiction since April. I’ve lost friends, and been into hospital with Smerch withdrawals. Because Smerch addiction has no known cure at this point, Children in Need feeds my addiction so I can stay healthy and deleriously happy.”
Please reblog to help raise awareness of Smerch addiction, maybe even share your own stories if you also suffer from this problem! :)
Smerch withdrawals?
Here, let me feed your addiction with…
Clothes that look good on Steve Merchant!
1. T-shirts
2. Black shirts
3. Scarves
4. All other shirts
5. Jeans
6. Everything else
”Hello, police? Yes, this is Stephen Merchant. I was walking home when about 5 teenage girls attacked me. Now I’m in a locked room, with my hands tied together and my legs tied to a chair, which I am currently stuck to. Don’t laugh, it took 3 tries to dial this number! Anyway, the girls said they were getting a camera to ‘fulfill the Smerchettes’ wishes’ so I would appretiate it if you could send someone to rescuse me. No, I’m not joking. No! Don’t hang up! They’re coming back. Don’t leave me here! Help me! Are you still there? Oh no. Here they come.”
